I'm Coming Off a Frustrating and Awful Week of Writing

Navigating the highs and lows of the creative process, and dealing with angry people

Hello Everyone!

If I’d have written this post on Thursday or Friday, I would have been absolutely furious, but I’ve calmed down since then. Suffice it to say, I had a frustrating week. I had a lot of bad news and a bizarre and troubling interaction with somebody I thought I could respect. I’ll get into all that in a moment, but let me sum up by saying I feel better today.

Also, the sink is looking alright, so I’ve got that going for me, which is nice…

The good

The best part of my week was getting interviewed by Robin Wilding on Tuesday. I don’t think the interview is available yet, but I’ll send the link when I get it. I’ve done a lot of interviews throughout the years, but I think this was the first one where somebody actually knew me as a writer. In the past it’s always been, “Oh, you’ve got a book out, well, come on and talk about it.” But the people who interviewed me had never actually read the book.

Robin is an insightful writer who always comes up with excellent assessments based on minimal information. She’s got her finger on the pulse of what’s happening at Medium a lot more than I do, and if something changes on the platform, I usually scan her profile to see the explanation. She almost always is among the first to post a relevant article, and her writing is also very funny.

It’s fun to chat with other writers because they give me an idea of how I’m coming across, and they also inspire ideas for future articles. That happens whenever I chat with Allison Acheson too. Sometimes people give you tidbits of information that feel like a door has opened. Sometimes it’s a garage door.

Anyway, I hope Robin has good luck with her channel and hope to have the opportunity to answer some questions again. Maybe we can get Jason Provencio on the next one and just keep expanding the conversation?

The bad

I was having a frustrating week because a couple of the articles I wrote didn’t seem to get the attention they deserved. The problem with writing is that it’s easy to fly a little too close to the sun. Expectations are bad for you.

Eventually, I realized I need to take a step back and practice gratitude. It’s important not to get too emotionally attached to any one article. Some of them sail, some of them sink, and you need to put your head down and move on to the next one.

When an article doesn’t get as much attention as you think it deserves, the best thing to do is to write a better one. Don’t get into the self-sabotaging death spiral of despair.

Writers complain about changes in their earnings all the time. It’s not a good look. At the same time, I realize that people’s lives depend on their incomes, so this topic is complex. I think our real issue is that, if you live in the US anyway, you’re in a very oppressive society. Let’s face it, our healthcare system is terrifying. You’re a broken arm away from being homeless due to medical bills, even if you have insurance. Even if you call to make sure your insurance is going to cover a medical visit, you can expect to get a surprise bill for $600 in the mail shortly thereafter.

This is why people are on edge. When they complain about platforms, they’re really complaining about the injustices inherent to our system. It creates a lot of infighting and it’s unfortunate.

I took a step back and was able to see that I continue to gain followers and subscribers on Medium. I receive wonderful comments from very intelligent people who have done a lot to inform the way I think about some really important topics. After a while, I was able to see that even though I thought I’d taken a hit, things were actually going really well.

But there’s one more factor at play from last week.

The ugly

Around Wednesday I received a bizarre email from a writer I used to really respect.

Now, I’ve written a lot of articles about what it takes to succeed on Medium. People ask and ask and ask, so I’ve tried to provide useful guidelines. However, it’s never been my intention to imply that these guidelines are absolute rules that are written in stone.

The main thing about the Boost program is that they want truly insightful, in-depth articles. It has been my experience that the 6 minute mark represents a good target for what is most likely to succeed. I’ve seen this in my own work too. The way earnings are calculated in Medium, it’s a good practice to write something around 6 minutes. That’s long enough to maximize your earnings, but short enough to keep people engaged.

To be clear, I read, write, edit, publish and nominate stories of all lengths. All I’m telling you is my opinion based on my experience which is what people have asked for.

This whole discussion is fluid. It’s almost impossible to talk about anything creative in absolute terms because artists are trying new things all the time. When readers are looking for direction, I provide it.

Well, I had one reader interpret my advice as an attack on articles that were 5 minutes or less. She accused me of “punishing” writers and said that I was “bad for the platform” and that she was going to “send a report.” She also went on to say that publications like the New York Times frequently published articles with a read time of 4 minutes.

I got this email and was so stunned I didn’t even know how to react. That’s pretty unusual for me. I had to read it about six times to even figure out what she was mad about.

The comment about the New York Times is really weird. The New York Times can do whatever it wants, but Medium is not the New York Times. I’m writing from the perspective of a person who has had a considerable amount of success on Medium. All I ever try to do is provide good advice that will help other writers succeed. For somebody to come along and accuse me of being “harmful” because I don’t write for Medium like it’s the New York Times was extremely troubling.

I was really upset about this for a couple of days.

It also occurred to me that if this writer had followed through on her threat to “report” me, that might be the reason why I’d seen a downturn in traffic for my articles last week. Obviously, Medium has to do its due diligence. Perhaps when a report is received it triggers a mechanism that reduces distribution until the complaint has been investigated?

Now, that’s all speculation, but that’s what was going through my head to make me frustrated. I always find it deeply disturbing when I have to deal with somebody who is being stubbornly irrational. I get a ton of hostile comments, I get death threats, occasionally people even track me down on social media to say things like, “Now I know where you live” (they don’t, I don’t put my address on social media... but still). Above all, I have to protect my mental health, so I’m pretty quick on the block button.

However, I don’t do that lightly with people I know. If I have worked with a writer before and I’ve interacted with their work and I respect them, I’ll make an effort to reach an understanding. But when that person insists on attacking my ability to make a living, then I have to get out of there.

It does me no good to fret over things that are out of my control. I’m at my best when I’m writing. Therefore, when somebody begins to throw daggers at me, I have to block and move on even if I’m reluctant to do so. If anything, I error too much on the side of giving hostile people a second chance.

So, I blocked the person.

And then... a boost

I felt pretty bad about all of this all the way up until last night, but then I got a surprise “Congratulations! Your story has been boosted!” notification. It was on one of the three articles I wrote last week that I thought was really good.

In fact, I was surprised because the one that got the boost was the one I thought was the most controversial of the three: Standing For the National Anthem Is a Symbol of White Supremacy. This is an important article and people need to read it, so I’m glad.

So, maybe I passed my account evaluation (I was being evaluated on my reviewer account last week too... maybe that was also worrying me?). Or maybe there was no evaluation. The problem with being a writer is that you’re vulnerable to negative speculation. This is why it’s better to write. If you’re going to conceive of devastating horror stories, you might as well write them down so you can send them off and make money on them. When writers are sitting around fretting and not writing, all that creativity can turn against them.

So write, even when it feels like the world is coming down around you.

Now I’m off to finish up my daughter’s room remodel. Today I’m filling up all the cracks with silicone because I’m not a good enough carpenter to cut two pieces of wood so that they fit together.

As always, I’d love to hear your questions and comments!