I Absolutely Blame Trump’s Hate Rhetoric for the Murder and Rape of a Child in My City
I Absolutely Blame Trump’s Hate Rhetoric for the Murder and Rape of a Child in My City
American society normalizes toxic masculinity and we have to change
Originally published April 30th, 2022
The most horrific thing I can imagine has befallen my community. A few days ago a ten year old girl was murdered and her body was defiled. I was among those out looking for the body.
This has been the longest week I can remember.
My family is reeling. My children are 9 and 11. We’re horrified. We’re scared. We’re sad. We’re traumatized.
Yesterday my wife and kids tried to recuperate a sense of normalcy by walking out to a local restaurant. Our Main Street has been decorated with purple ribbons to memorialize the victim.
Our grieving was interrupted.
A block away from the restaurant, up rolls this massive white pickup truck. It was one of those trucks which expels an echoing “BUUURRRP!” that disrupts the peace and startles everyone causing them to turn and look.
In the bed of this pickup truck the driver had mounted a huge 4 foot by 6 foot flag that read “F$ck Biden.”
Not even, “Let’s Go Brandon.” It used a straight up profanity.
So, there I am, standing with my wife and my children, all of us gutted with grief, thinking about this little girl who was murdered and violated.
In the midst of that vulnerable, private moment, we’re disturbed by some entitled Trump supporter who decided now was the perfect time to come along with his obnoxiously loud truck. Oblivious to anyone else, he drove down a street covered in ribbons to memorialize a murdered child.
He hit the gas “BUUUUUURRRRRPPPP!” He waved his “F$ck Biden” flag. He stuck his head out the window and laughed.
What a complete breach of decorum.
What a total lack of decency.
What a display of utter ignorance.
I was left wondering why we can’t have just one day of the year that’s not about entitled crybaby Trump supporters throwing a temper tantrums over the fact that they’re not mature enough to acknowledge their candidate is a loser?
They can’t even give us a moment’s reprieve from their constant, entitled hatred.
It’s always got to be about them. In their minds, they’re the real victims. They can’t even stop their self-righteous protest over a complete non issue for ONE SECOND to let decent people mourn the murder of a child.
Nope!
I guarantee some of them are going to see this article and send me death threats. They’re going to say, “This isn’t the time to make it about politics.”
I didn’t make it about politics.
The Trump supporters did when they assaulted our ears and eyes by interrupting our mourning with their profane messaging.
I didn’t need a reminder of how normalized and prevalent toxic masculinity is in American culture. The dead body of a little girl made that clear. Yet, A Trump supporter decided he had to highlight and underscore his “right” to toxic masculinity anyway.
When a child dies and their only response is “BUUUUURRRP! F$ck Biden!” you have to wonder if they have any humanity left at all.
Toxic masculinity has been normalized in America
In my title, I noted that the girl was “murdered and then raped.”
That order of phrasing was intentional.
One thing that’s scared me in the last few days is that the suspect would somehow be turned into some kind of right-wing hero with external forces marshaling to make bail. The result would be he’d get released back into the area where my family lives.
The political right loves to anoint people who are accused of crimes, particularly crimes against women, as “the true victims.”
The suspect allegedly murdered her and then he raped her.
Believe me when I read that I wanted to throw my phone away and leave the world behind.
But that reaction is not responsible. We have to face the horror of this. We have to think about this. We have to identify and correct the circumstances that led to this or it’s going to happen again.
What leads a person to do something so horrible?
How do they get into a mental state where they can so blatantly disrespect basic humanity?
Here’s the first thing that came to mind:
I moved on her like a bitch — Donald Trump as quoted by Libby Nelson
The suspect in the murder and rape is 14. Basically, half of his life has been spent in an environment where Trump’s deplorable, disgusting words were normalized.
He grew up in this.
That was the crucible that forged him.
For they have sown the wind, and they shall reap the whirlwind — Hosea 8:7
Our society did not respond to Trump’s words and actions responsibly. We should have denounced him. He should have been made to withdraw in shame.
He should have been rejected.
We should have been mindful that accepting such behavior could lead to further violence against women.
Instead, he was elected! He was praised. People think it’s a big joke.
It’s not a joke.
“Make liberals cry again”
From where I live, I could throw a baseball and just about hit the suspect’s house. I could turn the other way and throw a baseball to the house where the victim lived. It would take about three throws to hit the spot where the body was found.
The house where they took the suspect into custody is on my running loop. I’ve been by that house thousands of times.
Something the media isn’t going to report is that various houses in this area were always decorated with very aggressive Trump banners. The banners on that stretch of road are gone now, but there are still many Trump banners throughout my city.
One of the banners said “Vote Trump: Make Liberals Cry Again.” Like this one:
Well, you did it.
When they found the body of a 10 year old girl who was murdered and raped near my home, I cried. I called up my wife and cried. She left work and came home.
I guess Trump supporters would say that’s pathetic.
“It’s pathetic that a full-grown man would cry!”
Call me a snowflake.
I’ve been crying all week.
You see these guys with T-shirts that say “Warning: Toxic Masculinity” like it’s something to be proud of.
They think they’re so funny.
They defend the mindset that leads to people thinking they have a right to murder and rape little girls.
That’s what’s happening.
I don’t think it’s funny.
Don’t tell me not to get political
They always say we shouldn’t talk about about things like this right after a tragedy. Who is anyone to tell me what I have the right to talk about?
I think right after a tragedy is EXACTLY WHEN you should say what you think.
Doesn’t everyone say, “You’re traumatized, you should go and talk to somebody?”
THAT’S WHAT I’M DOING!
I’M TALKING TO YOU!
I feel I’ve earned the right to say what I think.
I was out there looking for her.
I was out there trying to help!
Where were they?
Who’s the person who decided it’s “appropriate” to offer “thoughts and prayers,” but who then insists you’re somehow crossing a line if you say “end violence against women” or “stop toxic masculinity” or “women deserve the right to reproductive health care” or “men don’t own women”?
Why do people demand that they have the authority to exert control over how we mourn?
“You should sit in the house, not make a fuss, and suffer in silence.”
To hell with that! I am going to DO something so that NOTHING like this EVER happens to ANY OTHER PERSON EVER AGAIN!
“In America, we mourn by putting up ribbons and offering thoughts and prayers.”
IT’S NOT WORKING!
THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING!
WE HAVE TO BE RESPONSIBLE!
WE HAVE TO FACE THE SICKNESSESS IN OUR SOCIETY THAT LEAD TO THESE HORRIFIC EVENTS!
Don’t you see? You’re only “allowed” to take the “pre-approved” actions that are designed to protect the status quo.
OUR COUNTRY IS BROKEN!
We are only allowed to behave in a way that they consider to be the “right” way to mourn.
If we infringe on the beliefs they hold dear, even if it’s demonstrable that those beliefs led to this tragedy, they pivot and start to attack us.
Well, bring it on. Better you attack me than some innocent girl.
I’ll ask again: Where were these people when I was out in the woods looking for the body?
They were probably out driving around in their noisy trucks with the 4 foot by 6 foot F#ck Biden sign that my kids have to look at.
There’s a sickness in rural Wisconsin
Chippewa Falls, WI is only forty-five minutes away from Barron, WI where, a few years ago, Jayme Closs was kidnapped and held captive after her parents were murdered.
Spooner, WI is a little over an hour away, 15 year old Sara Bushland, who went missing from Spooner in 1996, has never been found.
Little girls keep suffering violence.
Meanwhile, my community is filled with an enormous population of frustrated, entitled men who have worked themselves up into a murderous rage by convincing themselves of a lie that they’ve somehow been cheated.
They stomp around angry, threatening to “take back what’s rightfully theirs.”
My wife had a day off a week ago, so we went out to a bar for lunch.
Sitting at the bar, Biden comes on the TV to make an announcement and the guy next to us started screaming profanities at the screen.
I thought I was going to have to restrain him and call the cops, but nobody else took notice. Everybody just accepted that this was a normal way to behave.
How is that acceptable behavior?
I’ve been living in constant fear because my wife is an immigrant, and I have to hear normalized hate language about immigrants all the time.
It’s the whole Republican platform!
I live in constant fear that some jerk will stomp up and attack my kids for no other reason than because they’re not white.
These jerks decorate their yards and hang banners in their window in tribute to a candidate that lost TWO YEARS AGO!
A week ago I had to have a conversation with my daughters about how dangerous they are.
They’re nuts.
They’re unpredictable.
They’re hysterical.
They weren’t “cheated.” The election wasn’t “unfair.” They have no right to be angry.
They’re just losers. They have to accept it and try to do better.
But they refuse to do so.
The day the assault happened
I keep thinking about that day.
I feel like I did something wrong.
Maybe if I had heard her, maybe I could have gotten there, maybe she could have been saved?
I wish to god I’d heard it. These are the things that keep running through my mind. But even if I had heard it, I doubt I could have arrived in time. Even if I’d run at a full sprint, she would have probably been dead before I arrived.
Even if I had gotten there in time, would there have been any consequences for this attack?
What in our society leads you to believe that women are protected in America? What’s put in place to prevent this kind of thing?
American society has a terrible record of letting men who attack women off the hook.
If a kid is good at throwing a ball for the greater glory of a rural town, the powers that be tend to look the other way. Our laws were written by white men for the protection of white men.
Essentially, nothing is fair and American society DOESN’T EVEN TRY to protect its little girls.
Again, I’ll have Trump supporters read this and snort at me and laugh and tell me I’m being hysterical.
Again, I’ll say where were they the day I was out looking for the body of a 10 year old girl who had been murdered and raped?
They always make the mess.
They never stick around to help clean it up.
I’ve been warning people about this for years
Everybody is running around saying, “Who could have predicted this would happen?”
I did!
This is why I’ve been cutting Trump supporters out of my life. My wife and kids have been threatened multiple times by Trump supporters.
It’s felt like we’ve been marching to this horrible place for a long time. Nobody wants to change course!
I’ve told friends and family that if they voted for Trump, I never wanted to see them again. They snorted and me and called me ridiculous.
I used to think that if I said, “my children are threatened” they would at least have the decency to recognize they were speaking to a parent who is defending his child.
When I say something like that, you have to recognize I’m on the verge of losing control. But men who ascribe to toxic masculinity are so dumb and entitled they still try to provoke you!
I can’t be around people who think it’s an opportunity for mockery and humor when I mention I was out looking for the body of a 10 year old girl who had been murdered and raped.
That experience changes you.
I no longer have the patience to tolerate the kind of disrespect that Trump supporters routinely show for the dead. When a city is in mourning, you don’t drive around with your obnoxiously loud truck with the “F$ck Biden” flag.
Have some decency! Just shut up with your hate and your whining about how you’re a “victim” for a day! It’s not always about you. A child is dead!
The worst part is that Trump is only a symptom of the undercurrent of misogyny and toxic masculinity that plagues our whole society. Politicians are eroding reproductive rights all across the country to send a clear message that they “own” women’s bodies. Men are let off the hook for sexual assaults and allowed to run for office again and again.
These pathetic and cowardly men who have had everything handed to them on a silver platter and who still insist that they deserve more make me absolutely sick. The violence that descended upon my neighborhood is another facet of the attitude that incited these entitled losers to attack the Capitol on January 6th.
It’s time we held these people accountable.
It’s time we stomped out entitlement, toxic masculinity, violence against women, sexual violence, and child rape.
Seriously? You’re going to try and tell me I’m wrong about any of this? Seriously?
Spare me your ignorant comments.
Let’s embrace responsibility. Let’s make the world a better place. It starts by having the courage to call out evil when you see it.
Don’t let them tell you how to mourn. You know our society is messed up. How many children have to be murdered and raped? How many? Speak your truth. You’ve earned that right.
___________________________________________________________________
Thanks for reading! As always, leave your questions or comments below!
My CoSchedule referral link
Here’s my referral link to my preferred headline analyzer tool. If you sign up through this, it’s another way to support this newsletter (thank you).
We hear your frustration, Walter. But know, that your outrage, your vulnerability is a balm to so many of us who, like me, are exhausted by the hate, the violence, and the mind-boggling stupidity.
Jeeesus christ. What a horrific act. That poor baby.