Great thoughts, Walter. I'm 20 years ahead of you, and at about the same stage of realizing the power of memories, the enduring strength of bonds, and the urgency of time. Congratulations on such advanced self awareness. I am reminded of a line in About Schmidt with Jack Nicholson, where he writes to his financially sponsored foster child, Ndugu, about "appreciating what you have while you still have it. Remember that, young man." Glad Charlie is doing well. Best wishes to you and your family.
This story is beautiful and brought tears to my heart. In my seventies now and my two best friends from high school have left this plane of existence. But the memories of our adventures remain. Thank you for reminding me.
Thank you for this lovely story! This week I spoke with a woman who’s been my friend since junior high - 62 years now. I haven’t seen her in person for 50 years. But when we pick up the phone, when I hear her voice, we are 12 again, the memories flood back, and we are laughing like crazies and teasing each other. That’s got to be a little like time travel, doesn’t it?
You're on the right track, Walter. The present moment is all we have. We can't change the past and we can only create the future by actions taken now.
I'd encourage you to go to that reunion, mostly to find out what your classmates are like now. Warning: some may be tired or boring. Some will be amazing. The organizer of our 50th (who got me to attend with a handwritten letter) was a cheerleader. But she became an international pilot. Prepare to be surprised. Then report back!
I "organized" the 20th by securing a large room behind a bar that everybody knew. Then I told the people I wanted to see there, and asked them to invite the people they wanted to see, and so on. We ended up with 200+ out of our class of 435. One guy at the 50th said it was the best reunion he'd ever been to.
I think one of the hardest parts about raising kids is those teen years when the focus of life is entirely on them and adult friendships tend to fall by the wayside. Not because you don’t want to; but because you’re just too exhausted. Between work, kids’ commitments, and just getting dinner on the table every night, who has the energy? I remember when the last of my kids went off to college, it was like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I was no longer the engine keeping their lives running, and it was a giant relief. I wonder if other women feel this way, and if men experience these times differently?
That’s interesting feedback! As for me, it’s only been getting better and better. They’re already taking on more personal responsibility for their lives. I feel as if I’m tagging along at this point, and my eldest is only a freshman. I still read to them every night. We’ll see what happens, I’m just taking it day by day and trying to take it all in.
Great essay, Walter. The core theme is powerful: What year did you arrive at the age of reflection? If you are not there yet, when do you think that moment will be? If you just arrived, welcome to the age of awe. Once you become a permanent resident of PRESENT, you realize how true it is.... yesterday is gone and tomorrow is out of sight.
Great thoughts, Walter. I'm 20 years ahead of you, and at about the same stage of realizing the power of memories, the enduring strength of bonds, and the urgency of time. Congratulations on such advanced self awareness. I am reminded of a line in About Schmidt with Jack Nicholson, where he writes to his financially sponsored foster child, Ndugu, about "appreciating what you have while you still have it. Remember that, young man." Glad Charlie is doing well. Best wishes to you and your family.
Thank you! I haven't watched About Schmidt in a while, maybe I should revisit that one :)
Thank you for sharing. Wishing Charlie continued good health. Your article reminded me of the two bestie's I had in school. Jenny and Carol.
Jenny and I would wear each other's clothes sometimes. She had a purple outfit I loved and I had a gray skirt she liked. (We were in eighth grade!)
Carol was funny and made me laugh often.
Happy New Year to your family and everyone on substack.
Thank you so much for that kind reflection Ginny!
This story is beautiful and brought tears to my heart. In my seventies now and my two best friends from high school have left this plane of existence. But the memories of our adventures remain. Thank you for reminding me.
Thank you for that lovely comment! I needed that this morning!
Thank you for this lovely story! This week I spoke with a woman who’s been my friend since junior high - 62 years now. I haven’t seen her in person for 50 years. But when we pick up the phone, when I hear her voice, we are 12 again, the memories flood back, and we are laughing like crazies and teasing each other. That’s got to be a little like time travel, doesn’t it?
You're on the right track, Walter. The present moment is all we have. We can't change the past and we can only create the future by actions taken now.
I'd encourage you to go to that reunion, mostly to find out what your classmates are like now. Warning: some may be tired or boring. Some will be amazing. The organizer of our 50th (who got me to attend with a handwritten letter) was a cheerleader. But she became an international pilot. Prepare to be surprised. Then report back!
They ended up canceling it, nobody was interested, but yes, I had been planning to go.
I "organized" the 20th by securing a large room behind a bar that everybody knew. Then I told the people I wanted to see there, and asked them to invite the people they wanted to see, and so on. We ended up with 200+ out of our class of 435. One guy at the 50th said it was the best reunion he'd ever been to.
The present is infinite because it is always here
It's a little bit of a mind breaker though, isn't it :)
I think one of the hardest parts about raising kids is those teen years when the focus of life is entirely on them and adult friendships tend to fall by the wayside. Not because you don’t want to; but because you’re just too exhausted. Between work, kids’ commitments, and just getting dinner on the table every night, who has the energy? I remember when the last of my kids went off to college, it was like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I was no longer the engine keeping their lives running, and it was a giant relief. I wonder if other women feel this way, and if men experience these times differently?
That’s interesting feedback! As for me, it’s only been getting better and better. They’re already taking on more personal responsibility for their lives. I feel as if I’m tagging along at this point, and my eldest is only a freshman. I still read to them every night. We’ll see what happens, I’m just taking it day by day and trying to take it all in.
There simply comes an inflection point in life where you start looking back instead of into a future of uncertainty...sweet nonetheless
Thank you!
Such a lovely reminder to slow a bit and reach out to those who are part of your past and your memories and to make new ones.
Great essay, Walter. The core theme is powerful: What year did you arrive at the age of reflection? If you are not there yet, when do you think that moment will be? If you just arrived, welcome to the age of awe. Once you become a permanent resident of PRESENT, you realize how true it is.... yesterday is gone and tomorrow is out of sight.
Thank you for that delightful comment!